A Letter to the Wayshowers

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Dear Wayshowers,

The ancients spoke of this time. A time of great remembrance.

Many advanced souls have been drawn back to this planet at this time.

We do this for the purpose of being a wayshower for others. Of helping people remember the timeless, eternal Truth.

You have already done this.

Allow me to repeat: You have already done this.

Indeed, you have already awakened, in many past lifetimes. You have already lived in a state of pure bliss and perfection in other times, on other planets, in other dimensions. You have assisted countless beings in the ascension process.

And now you are here again. Back again, doing the same work, here on Earth. Why? Because it’s great fun! And a huge challenge! Helping a planet awaken is one of the greatest thrill rides known in the cosmos.

When you are born, you begin your life with a sense of forgetfulness about the Truth of your being. You have amnesia to who you truly are.

Therefore, for many years, you have been living in extreme self-doubt. You have even allowed yourself to believe you have been the “victim” of other people. Many of you have acquired some very intense battle wounds along the way.

However, here’s the good news. I’m here to remind you today of the uplifting truth: You have already done this! You have already awakened, many many times. You are aware of the process, the subtle nuances inherent in rising up out of darkness and into the light.

The mind makes all things so. Each person creates the story of how the Universe works. And when souls come together to tell the same story, things are accelerated.

Have no fear. This lifetime is very special. You have wisdom locked inside of you. You only have to find the keys.

Finding the keys is what drew you to this letter, and what draws you to the teachers and mentors who can help.

Pray. Ask the Great Spirit, Goddess, God (whatever you want to call it) to help you unlock the great wisdom within you.

Pray. Ask for help. Ask to be drawn to an enlightened teacher.

Pray. Speak to the very cells of your body, asking them to help you in this awakening process. Ask them to heal, so that you can be clear and vibrant.

Pray. Ask the Divine Force to transform and uplift all the people you encounter.

Dear friends, pray.

Pray that your awakening awakens others. Pray that your love heals the planet.

Go forth, in your full regal bearing, knowing that you are an advanced soul, with advanced wisdom to share. Awaken further!

When things get difficult, remember that you already have a PhD in ascension and it only seems like you are back in high school, fretting over an algebra problem. The truth is: you have done this work before, and you have chosen to repeat the process of awakening in this time, on this planet, right now, when things do seem very dark.

But the darkness is an illusion.

Remember that enlightenment is here, now. You are here now.

Take a breath.

Okay, take another breath.

Smile.

You’ve got this.

 

Blessings to you all,

Anya Light

A Letter of Encouragement to my Healer Friends

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Dear loved ones,

The truth about healing is that not everyone wants to heal. The truth about healing is that not everyone is ready.

It takes a super courageous soul to look within and say “Maybe the way I’ve been doing it is not the best way.” It takes a humble soul to accept an extended hand and say, “Please guide me; I’m lost.” It takes a person of the most radical nature to say, “I’m ready for a change.”

Change is hard; change is difficult. Many people you know, including many people on spiritual paths, have reached a certain level of evolvement and then stopped. They are content to stay at that level. For them, they believe that where they are at is the highest they can go. For them, there is no higher wisdom possible—they have closed themselves off to the possibility of more.

If someone has stopped, and they don’t even realize that they’ve stopped (this is called “denial”), then they will not want your healing assistance. They will not desire your encouragement to go further.

This is a hard lesson, I know! I’ve been learning it lately, and it is perhaps the most challenging lesson I’ve ever encountered. There is someone in my life whom I love dearly who has been stuck in a plateau of cynicism, isolation, and frustration for many years, but who refuses to accept my sincere offers of help. I offer her free Reiki sessions, hugs, and words of guidance—yet she is not truly open to any of them. She does not want the wisdom I have to share. She does not want healing. She does not want to see within herself all the ways she could grow. She is not ready.

Dear healer friends, you cannot force someone to heal. You may love someone with every ounce of your being, and put tremendous efforts into offering assistance, but that person may refuse every moment of it.

Yet, know this: You are not a failure! What is happening is that you are learning a deep lesson. The lesson of acceptance. Every human being is on their own journey. It may not be in this lifetime that they are ready to do the deep healing work that you yourself have done. For the path of a healer, a guide, a lightworker and wayshower of humanity, is not an easy path! It is perhaps the most challenging of all—because we have to face our “yucky stuff” in the process, head-on. What courage! What intensity! Not every soul is meant for this.

My friends, the truth about healing is that not everyone is ready to heal. Not everyone wants your help.

The truth is, the best way to help someone you love who is resistant to your efforts is by respecting their choice to be exactly where they are. Even if your heart is breaking by watching someone you love refuse the healing support you offer, allow your heart to break. Feel it break and feel it break and feel it break some more.

Through the pain of your broken heart, your ego dissolves further, and then, paradoxically, more love can shine through.

Through the pain, you find redemption in the light. You leave all projections of how things “should be” and you enter the present moment of now…where everyone you love, and every single being that exists, is absolutely perfect. Right now. Now. Now…

 

Loving All of You Forever,

Anya Light ♥

The Way you are Waking Up is Perfect

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This is an unedited letter from The Light Collective,

a group of benevolent beings channeled by Anya Light

 

Dear lightworkers & wayshowers,

We come forth in this letter, and we speak to you. We are a collection of your higher self and the higher selves of many others. We are things that cannot be accurately translated into your language. Perhaps the closest word might be “guides.” We are guides. And we speak to you now.

We want to tell you we have great compassion for you at this time. We know that life right now seems like a crazy roller coaster. You find yourself doubting and you find yourself in bliss.

On some days, you are up, way up, feeling the love pour from every pore of every human you encounter, from every leaf of every plant, and from every bird who soars into view.

And then there are other days, when you feel like a fraud. You are nervous to be around your family or old friends, because their unconsciousness triggers the part of you that is not yet settled in your enlightenment. On these days, you are somewhat guarded in public, still keeping that proverbial eye out for the pickpocket, for the thief, for the person who will “hurt” you.

This is a normal part of the process. Not every human wakes up in the instantaneous way that is so often mythologized and glorified. Sure, a few rare ones have woken up quickly, overnight, but our tendency to long for that type of awakening only stems from our longing to rapidly flee from the suffering that hurts so much.

Please know that your periodic dips into suffering (which, you must admit, are not nearly as bleak as they used to be) has a useful purpose. Every thing that happens in Creation has a useful purpose. Nothing is wasted; all parts are integral. In order to help humanity, in order to help evolve consciousness during this time of transition on the planet, it is necessary that during this time you fluctuate back into suffering (the feeling of separateness, disconnection with the Whole) in order to gather information about how that exactly feels, having the contrast of the enlightened state to compare it with. You lived as numb robot for much of your life, trying to dull away the pain of your conditioned upbringing through alcohol, drugs, casual sex, mindless entertainment, endless running and distraction. You could not bear the pain in your body. You ran. You hid.

And then the time came when there was a break from the ceaseless chatter of your mind and everything became still. The clouds broke and the sun emerged. The time for the ceaseless pain was no more, and there was relief.

Dear lightworker, you are miles away from that first taste of enlightenment. Yet, you still suffer.

We are here to tell you that this is okay. It is part of the plan. Embrace that this part of the journey is going to feel a bit rocky, a bit crazy sometimes. Once you have broken through the veil permanently, you will look back at this part of your journey with utter amazement and gratitude. For it is through acquainting yourself with the suffering while still partly conscious of Unity Consciousness that brings the deep insight and the teachings. There are those teachers who woke up as children, or those who woke up overnight. They have their teachings. You have yours; yours are different.

Without this half-way phase, there would be no way to translate the message to others who will be on a similar path to you. Dear soul, there are similar paths, similar soul-streams. You are preparing yourself and helping those who are in the similar stream. You will speak to those who know or will know of what you speak. The rest you cannot speak to; it is not meant to be. They have their own teachers.

The way you are waking up is perfect.

If you simply popped from suffering straight into full awareness, what could you teach? You could only teach the mysterious story. Many have taught that story already. What is new is the story of waking up gradually. Waking up while in the midst of profound challenge.

Many of you are not in monasteries. Many of you are not in peaceful ashrams or in spiritual communities where you have the leisure to focus on your breath all day. Most of you are out there, in the world, in the nitty gritty of life, earning paychecks and raising children and going to grocery stores and living in cities breathing in polluted air. You lack the grass under your feet and you lack a spiritual teacher by your side.

Indeed, this is a hard path. One of the most challenging.

You live daily amidst great suffering—great suffering by those who do not even know they suffer!

It may be tempting sometimes to feel victimized by your circumstances and to think of this as a burden. We encourage you to reframe your situation as your great gift. It is a gift from self to self. It is a mission like no other.

You are a piece of Source; Source lives within you, directing you on this path that you are on. We cannot emphasize enough the reassurance that it is not your job to flee from this “mundane” life to some “more spiritual” place. Stay where you are. Be who you are. Do not try to arrange the details of your life so they are more comfortable. Run, headfirst, into the meat of this life, of where you are now, of the circumstances you are presented with.

When you are in a park, hug a tree. Allow others to watch you do this. When you are in a grocery store, tell the cashier she has a beautiful voice or he is doing a fine job. When someone asks you how you are, you can reply, “This life is a blessing.” Be you. Be bold. Be the one who inspires. Speak the truth you know within your heart. Do not allow the unconsciousness of others bring your energy down, but simply allow their unconsciousness to grow strength in you, as you practice directing your love in their direction.

If you are constantly surrounded by difficult, stubborn, depressed, angry characters at work or even in your home, make each moment in their presence a moment of service. No words even need to be spoken. Simply open and consciously maintain yourself as a pure channel of light, needing nothing from them, absorbed in your own radiance, bathed in light, moving slowly, moving so that the love can pour into you and then also reflect out from you, magnified a million times by your heart. Feel the Christ within you grow as you are around them. They are, in effect, helping shape you to be the teacher you are coming to be. Without their suffering, you could not know the healing power of graceful compassion within you. Do you not see how everything has its place, its purpose?

Do you not see how the waking up process is guaranteed?

You have crossed the threshold of 2012, and now you walk among the multitudes, learning to be the master.

When you are drawn to stories about Jesus, about the Buddha, about other awakened ones, do you think this is a coincidence? We want you to know it is like who attracts like. Many years ago it was rare to be a master. Now, you are among much company.

Your heart is a powerful instrument. Do not underestimate it. Your heart has the power to cleanse the suffering of those around you.

If you fall back into suffering for hours, days, or even weeks at a time, know that this is not a fault or a failing. You are still a lightworker—and, in fact, perhaps this is the best time of all for you to reflect upon this soul title…for you know on some core level you signed up for exactly this. You chose to the one who goes to hell, to extend a hand to those who suffer. And you can extend that hand because you know what it is like to be in hell. You know the way of no-hope, so you can give hope.

Many of the people around you do not know they suffer. Wait, patiently, until there is a moment when you can speak to offer insight, to offer knowledge. But, until then, until there is that perfect opening, no words need be spoken. Your peaceful presence, your action, is all that is needed. If someone is hungry, feed them. If someone needs a hug, hug them. If someone is crying, smile and touch their hand. These seem to be such simple things, yet they are the difference between life and death, between heaven and hell.

You are the sunshine, breaking free from the clouds. You are the morning, after a long winter’s night. You are what you came to be. You are.

We see you. We appreciate you. We speak to you, in our chorus of voices, whispering to you, watching over you. Know that angels attend you in every moment and that your life is blessed.

You will, friend, in this lifetime, reach that state of abiding awakeness you seek. You will. Eventually the wave will come, and it will take you fully. The more you doubt this, the longer you will have to wait for it. So simply trust that it is coming. You shall be delivered from this roller-coaster-time. And once you have been freed, you will look back with gratitude, your heart now filled with empathic teachings that could have come no other way.

Every path is perfect. Every choice is right. Every day is a chance to live your most brightest light and most surest truth.

Go forward on this path, light worker, being of light, friend of humanity, angel in disguise, and do the job you came here to do. Forgive yourself on your “bad” days. Trust, have faith, and love with every ounce of your being!

 

Endless Blessings,

The Light Collective

 

Daily Miracles: the Wooden Floor, the Meditation

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Time spins and swirls: it doesn’t exist.

The great miracle is that we don’t lose the ones we love.

The ones we love stay with us. They shape us; they live and breathe inside our bones.

Today, I was missing someone. I sat down to meditate. I kept my eyes open and softly gazed at the wooden floor.

The patterns in the wood begin to spin and swirl. The light coming in from the window did a pretty, pretty dance.

For a few minutes, a few thoughts held on…

and…then…they were gone.

I was me. Just me again. Just me, with you. Us. The infinite Universe. A small being, and also everything.

You were there. The one I was missing. You were there.

The meditation bell rang, we did our bows, and then I put on my shoes. I entered the day.

Transcending Self-Sabotage: A Frequency Perspective

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You’ve probably heard of self-sabotage.

Self-sabotage is when we find ourselves acting in ways that are totally contrary to what we have learned. In other words, we “know better”—and yet we do it anyway.

Why do we do this?

Today I’d like to talk with you about self-sabotage in a different way, a way you’ve probably never heard before.

I’d like to explain self-sabotage from an energetic perspective. From the perspective of frequency.

 

What are Frequencies?

In our daily lives, we exist in a constantly fluctuating range of energetic frequencies. The range always exists, meaning that there is always going to be the lowest rung on the ladder that we could possibly feel on any given day at that particular stage in our life, and, conversely, there is always going to be the highest rung that we could possibly feel given that particular stage of our life.

As time passes, what constitutes our typical range will change. What you are capable of experiencing changes. Over the years, your highs will get even higher. And as time passes, your lows will not be as low as they once were.

Simply put, frequencies are emotions. Emotions are frequencies. They are one and the same.

An emotion is simply a frequency interpreted by the body-mind. So, for example, sadness and depression could be characterized as a low frequency, while the emotions of happiness and joy could be characterized as a high frequency. Sensations in the body such as heaviness and sluggishness could be characterized as low frequency, while sensations such as lightness and flexibility could be characterized as high frequency.

If you feel like you’re slugging through thick mud, you are in low frequency. If you feel like your body is vibrating or floating, then you are in high frequency.

What we experience on any given day is going to fluctuate, from hour to hour, even sometimes from minute to minute. This fluctuation is a normal part of being alive in a body. Even the great enlightened sages and teachers fluctuate: they sometimes feel neutrality, calm, joy, bliss, sleepiness, peace, and sometimes they even feel sadness. We all fluctuate. To fluctuate in frequency is to be human.

 

The Pattern of Self-sabotage

If we can view emotions and sensations as existing in an ever-shifting range of frequencies, then we can understand self-sabotage and how to gently dissolve this pattern out of our existence.

Self-sabotage is when we engage in an action or behavior that lowers our frequency. It is often an addictive or compulsive behavior. Often, after we self-sabotage, we feel like we’ve just woken up out of a bad dream. There’s this hazy, surreal quality to the whole action of self-sabotage, and when we come out of it, we are left scratching our heads, thinking, “Why in the world did I do that?

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on self-sabotage in my own life.

I recently had a gathering at my home, where twenty incredible friends gathered to partake in delicious nutritious food together, sing magical songs, meditate, fire-spin, and participate in a group healing session. It was amazing, out-of-this-world! Many who participated in the event commented that it was the highest they’ve ever felt without using drugs.

I too left the event with a feeling of elation. The following day, I felt I was walking on a cloud. All of life made sense, and everyone I encountered looked as beautiful as the Buddha. There was a shine to everything, a glow.

Two days later, however, I found myself reaching for some chocolate. As I am recovering from adrenal fatigue syndrome, I know that it is best to avoid caffeine and sugar in my diet. I have learned, over and over, that what my body needs most is total peace and calm—not stimulation. There is not a shred of doubt in my mind that chocolate has negative consequences for my body.

And yet, I ate the chocolate. I ate a lot of chocolate. You could say I totally binged on chocolate.

As you might imagine, the next few days were hell. The caffeine interrupted my sleep patterns, and I was left a jittery, exhausted mess.

Why in the world did I do that to myself? Why did I make that lousy choice? At the outset, this seemed like a complicated inquiry for me to undertake. Yet, after reflecting and meditating, I realized that the answer was quite simple.

The answers to my questions are most easily revealed through an energetic perspective.

Let’s say you are flying high, like I was just after getting together with my friends… perhaps you just got a promotion at work, or perhaps you have just made love to your sweetie for the first time. Whatever the case, you are experiencing a higher rung on the ladder of your own personal frequency range. You are flying; you are free; perhaps you even feel weightless. You feel the world is vibrating to the beat of your own joyful heart, and you hope that you will somehow stay in this ecstasy forever.

But then the ego comes in. The ego doesn’t understand what joy feels like; the ego doesn’t understand what bliss feels like. The ego only knows separation and pain, and so that is what it tries to reinforce.

The ego decides, then, that the only thing it can do is to reassert yourself is to feed your mind doubts, worries, or lies.

When I reached for chocolate on that fateful day, I had the idea in my mind that maybe I would feel even better than I already did by eating the chocolate.

Is that crazy? Well, yes, of course—but that is exactly how the ego operates! The ego feeds us crazy ideas in order to re-establish itself and its own experience (pain, suffering, separation).

Based upon my years of experience as a person recovering from adrenal fatigue, I had learned without a shadow of a doubt that caffeine is one of the worst poisons I can put into my body. I knew this! And…yet…I believed the idea that the ego fed me: that if I ate the chocolate, I would be flying even higher than I was before.

 

Transcending the Pattern

Why did I believe the lie that the ego told me?

Well, there was clearly some subconscious things happening that I was unaware of. What I was experiencing, the day after the gathering of friends, was bliss. Total ecstasy. In Western culture, the state of bliss is not recognized as culturally acceptable behavior. There is, in fact, a deep suspicion of bliss. Bliss is seen as craziness, madness, as out-of-bounds from normal social existence.

I was in bliss—meaning, I was One with all. I was not concerned with paying my bills, I was not concerned with clocks and calendars. I remember walking around my neighborhood the day after the event, and seeing every stone, every blade of grass, and every person walking their dog as a piece of my own soul. I felt intimately connected to everyone and everything I saw. I felt deep love and compassion. This was bliss. This was what the great sages feel in every moment. This was enlightenment. This was it. I was it.

And then my ego totally freaked out. And, actually, justifiably so—because it felt like it was dying! It indeed was losing its grip on my reality.

The ego came in, reminding me (on a subconscious level) about the mandate against bliss in our culture. It came in, warning me that this high frequency might obliterate all the things in my life that I take for granted: maybe if I stayed in this state long enough, I would lose all my friends? Or maybe I would lose my work, my home? Maybe if I stayed in this state, my body might dissolve altogether or spontaneously combust?

All these worries and thoughts were fed to me, by my ego, on a subconscious level. I took them in. And then on, a conscious level, this thought appeared in my mind: If you eat chocolate, you might feel even more awesome than you already do.

The reality of living in a body in a Universe composed of energy is that energy fluctuates. After a few days, or perhaps at most a few weeks, my frequency, after my friendship gathering, would have dipped a bit lower as the days passed. It would have been normal, natural, and quite alright for me to dip down out of bliss, and perhaps into mid-range frequencies: feelings such as optimism, tenderness, safety, centeredness, stillness, peace, or mellow calm. That would have been normal, and to be expected.

And, yet, my self-sabotaging behavior caused me to quickly plummet to much much lower states such as anxiety and sadness.

If we want to understand why we engage in self-sabotage, we must understand it from the perspective of energy, of frequency. The ego wants to knock us down from high-frequency states—because it fears the dissolution of its own existence—by introducing erroneous logic into our minds. Because we are so high, so open and trusting of ourselves, then, during these high frequency states (where we see the perfection in everything, the love in all), we then can sometimes fail to use logic in making decisions. It is as if the ego knows we are liable to say “yes” to anything, because we feel so good. We trust. And, yet, this trust without logic will ultimately be our downfall, as we engage in self-sabotaging behavior.

Yes, it is good to trust and to surrender to the Universe, but it is also imperative that we continue to use logic and rationality when faced with certain choices in our lives. For example, if we are healing from alcohol abuse, then, whilst in a state of bliss, the ego might arise and whisper: “It won’t hurt to have a drink now. I can handle it; I won’t become addicted again.” If a thought like this occurs to us, we can simply note that the thought is in reference to a pattern of addiction. A warning flag can then go up in our mind. With loving attention, we can review the past of our lives, review our intentions for the future, and make the informed choice of abstaining from the drink.

 

The Rainbow of Life

Too often, we think of the awakening path as devoid of using the mind. This is simply not true!

While it is true that meditative practices can liberate us from the worries and negative patterns of the mind, it is also true that the mind can be a powerful tool. The mind can serve us on our awakening path when we are its master.

Therefore, when we enter high vibrational states such as bliss and ecstasy, we cannot simply relinquish our logical minds and allow the ego to trick us into making self-sabotaging choices in order to bring our frequency back down into a state of separation.

When we are in joy or bliss we can remind ourselves that it will naturally happen, over days or weeks, that we will at some point dip down a bit, maybe into states such as alert friendliness, thankfulness, peace, quiet, serenity, trust, or tranquility—perhaps not as fun to experience as joy or bliss, but still wonderful states to experience.

And, equally so, we can use our minds to remember that if we are in low frequency states (depression, anxiety, fear), our ego will want to drag us down even further, and therefore will tempt us with lower frequency choices: such as using drugs/alcohol, using sexuality to numb or escape our emotions, oversleeping, binging on “comfort” foods, and consuming mindless media.

When we see how the ego simply wants to maintain its hold on our lives, it is easier to see through these patterns, and enter the light of a new consciousness.

When we avoid self-sabotaging behaviors through using the wonderful powers of our mind, the new “low” end of our frequency range can shift over time: from depression to sadness, from sadness to tension, from tension to relaxation, from relaxation to happiness.

This process takes time. Yet, it is entirely possible that a single lifetime can produce amazing change. In my life, for example, I have gone from suicidal depression as the lowest rung on my frequency range to states of lethargy and sadness as now being the lowest of what it is possible for me to experience during this phase of my life. Each year, it keeps getting better and better. Each day: better and better.

As we attune ourselves to viewing the world from a frequency perspective, to viewing our own bodies and minds as that of energy beings, things just start to make more sense. We can see our lives from a more nuanced point of view, and we can take positive action, rather than self-sabotaging reaction, and enjoy our lives, fully, in all their glorious colors.

Playfulness

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When people think of spiritual practice, “playfulness” is not usually the first word that comes to mind. We might think that dancing on a beach or rolling around in the grass is playful, but that a spiritual practice must be the opposite: serious. I often see many people who follow a spiritual practice become very serious. If you think or practice something slightly different than what they practice, they even can become offended or angry. In a way, instead of finding spaciousness and freedom in their practice, they have put themselves in yet another box, the spiritual box.

We might begin a spiritual practice to step out of the boxes we put ourselves in during our daily life. But often we just replace that tight box of our normal daily life with a new tight box of a spiritual practice. We trade one rigid, constricting way of being for another rigid, constricting way of being. And because we call the new way spiritual practice, we may tell ourselves (and others) that this is great, this is better, this is how and who we want to be in our practice and in our life.

But in reality we practice a spiritual practice to lay bare our innate light. Many different traditions use the metaphor of light: clear light, great bright light, inner light, and light of life, just to name a few. This light can not be boxed in; it is the light of spiritual freedom and playfulness.

Look outside and see how the natural light plays through the leaves of the tree, how it glitters on the waves in the lake and how it dances around the streets. This natural light touches everything with a playfulness and with equality. No distinctions are being made, no labels are being placed, no judgments are being made by this light. Even if a big storm is brewing, the light plays and dances around and within the storm, the light dances freely in a playful manner.

Thus, we can start to see if we are practicing our spiritual practice in the truest way by looking at ourselves and seeing if we are still in our tight box, or if have we stepped out of the box and are becoming more playful. Look at the Dalai Lama, Shunryu Suzuki, Thich Nhat Hanh, Daehaeng Kun Sunim, and Mingyur Rinpoche, who have laid bare their inner light. Deep spiritual practice has not made them sober or serious; their eyes have a perpetual twinkle. They are so playful and their playful light has touched thousands of people. Their teachings are full of laughter, playfulness, and direct non-complicated wisdom. Due to having laid bare their innate playful light, they teach in a playful, joyful, and light manner. Whether we imagine them (or ourselves) rolling around in the grass or sharing wisdom in a class, the light and playfulness can shine through.

 

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Frans Stiene has been a major influence on global research into the system of Reiki since the early 2000s. His practical understanding of the Japanese influences on the system have allowed students around the world to connect deeply with this practice. Frans is a co-founder of the International House of Reiki with Bronwen Logan (Stiene). He has also co-authored with her the critically acclaimed books The Reiki Sourcebook, The Japanese Art of Reiki, and A-Z of Reiki Pocketbook.

 

“Playfulness” was originally published on International House of Reiki blog.

Sweaty Hands and Self-Love: A Story of Healing

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At every stage of life, there is always learning and growth to be had.

Regardless of your particular role in society, a major step in the awakening process is to openly share and talk about your struggles with others. Even if you are a healer or a teacher or a guide to others (as I am), it is imperative that you, from time to time, share about your current challenges.

Yes, it may be scary to talk about our struggles (holy hell, I know that the story I’m about to share is super scary for me to admit!), but this kind of vulnerable sharing is what brings our shame and negative feelings out of the darkness and into the light of consciousness. By sharing openly, we heal. We transform.

By my sharing with you today about a current challenge of mine, I hope you will be inspired to share with a loved one what you are actively engaged in transforming.

MY SWEATING “PROBLEM”

When the temperature rises above 75 degrees (roughly), my hands and feet begin to sweat.

This happens because my endocrine system is imbalanced.

I am working on healing it.

Some days are worse than others. On some days, it’s simply a light dampness; on other days, the sweating is so intense that I am literally unable to type on my laptop because I fear that such a steady flow of liquid will break the machine.

For all of my life, this issue has plagued me. Not only is it often physically uncomfortable (for example, it’s difficult to do yoga sometimes, because my hands and feet are sliding all around the mat), but it is socially uncomfortable as well.

If the weather is warm that day, after a class or a workshop, when one of my students approaches me and holds out their hand for a handshake, I sometimes inwardly grimace.

Or, if I’m doing a Reiki healing session with a client, when it is time for me to touch a part of their body that is unclothed (face, neck, arms or legs), I sometimes worry that the sweat rolling off my fingertips is a distraction or an irritation for them.

Or, if I’m dating someone new…there is always this awkward moment where they reach out to hold my hand, and I want to run in the opposite direction.

Over the years, I have equated my sweaty hands with being a total weirdo. With being a loser, or a freak.

I so often feel shame when my hands come into contact with another person. (Which is surely ironic—considering the fact that I work as a hands-on healer!)

Many times, when I’ve shaken hands with someone, and they’ve literally gotten their hand soaked (it’s quite incredible, really), I’ve seen the look of mild irritation or confusion on their face, as they then wipe their hand on their pants, unsure about what they’ve just encountered. I assume they’re thinking something like, “What the hell was that?” When I see that look on their face, my heart absolutely breaks. I feel like a failure as a human being. A freak. A weirdo.

 

QUESTIONS AND REALIZATIONS

For years and years—basically, my whole life—I have actively hated and despised this aspect of my physical body. And though I deeply adore warm weather, I sometimes find myself dreading the spring months because of the seemingly inevitable social awkwardness it can bring.

But…lately…I’ve been asking myself some deep questions.

Why am I so ashamed? Why do I assume others will have negative feelings about the wetness of my hands? Why do I worry and care about what others think? What does this worry reflect about my own capacity for acceptance and self-love? And since I judge myself in this way, in what ways do I still judge others for not being “perfect”?

In so many ways, I have dropped concern for social norms and done my own thing. I’m a rebel. I am an independent, free-spirit. I don’t follow fashion norms. I wear non-matching clothes without a second thought. I don’t shave my legs; I don’t conform to gender norms. And I’ve broken just about every sexuality and relationship norm there is. In my rather conservative, frozen-in-time tiny town, I hug trees, sing, and openly perform sacred rituals in public spaces where such things are seen by the majority as outlandish, if not outright insane.

In so many aspects of my life, I do not give a crap what others think about me.

So why, in this one aspect, do I still worry about judgment and criticism from others?

After much recent reflection, I realize that the basis of my worry has to do with the fact that I’ve been stressed about presenting myself in a certain way, since my work highly depends on the impressions others have of me in order to seek my services. Basically, I’ve wanted to show myself as “perfect,” so others will be inspired to learn from me.

However, this attempt to be seen as perfect has created an impossible situation, where I am, time and time again, judging myself as less than perfect. It has set up a no-win scenario, where I am feeling like I have to hide behind a mask, rather than present my true self to others, warts and all.

Ultimately, what I realized is: Lately, my sweaty hands are prompting me to be more honest with others. I want to take all the masks off.

My sweaty hands are also helping me to realize how much more I need to love myself, unconditionally.

Do I have the courage to love myself, every single bit of me, no matter what?

Do I have the courage to claim my experience, and say to the Universe: “I love myself through my hands. I love myself through my feet. I love myself, whether sweaty or dry. I love myself, no matter what.”

And, do I have the courage to decree that I am the creator of my own experience?

 

A NEW CHAPTER

I realize that I do not know when the full physical healing of my endocrine system will happen. I know that the core of the imbalance is from years of undiagnosed PTSD.

And even though I now consider myself healed from PTSD—meaning that I have successfully rewired my brain into healthier patterns so that I no longer feel victimized by my past and meaning that I no longer require that label to make progress on my awakening journey—the reality is that my endocrine system, my physical body, is still catching up.

For years I have faithfully practiced healthy eating, daily meditation, and Reiki self-healing. And the situation still persists.

I’ve been so angry with the Universe. Why haven’t I been healed yet, when I’ve been so diligent to follow the path of healing?

And this anger…this anger is now asking to be transmuted, transformed, into patience, peace, acceptance, and self-love. I need to be with myself, just as I am, unconditionally, regardless of whether the issue is ever cured in this lifetime.

I have to be okay with the possibility that my hands and feet might always sweat more than I’d like.

That’s a hard lesson to learn, but I am ready.

The time is now for a new chapter. Yesterday, I attended a social function. New friends everywhere, wanting to shake my hand, wanting to be close. And so yesterday I began to practice something new. I began to shake hands with people, and as I did so, I silently repeated the mantra: “I love myself through my hands, I love myself through my hands, I love myself through my hands…”

As I met people by looking deeply into their eyes and seeing the lovely Spirit that lies within, I realized that what counts is not the dryness or the wetness of my hands. What counts is my ability to meet them where they are at, and to see the God within.

In order to do this, I need to meet myself in just that same way. If I am blocked because I cannot love this part of me, what are the chances that I can love them in the deepest way?

I am ready for this change. I am ready to create a new reality, where I love myself fully and totally, no matter what.

 

WHAT’S YOUR STORY?

My dear friends, thanks so much for listening to my story.

It’s felt scary, but also remarkably good to share with you.

And now, I invite you to share with us, in return. Let’s exchange energy and create a complete circle of healing.

What is it that you have disliked or even despised about yourself that you can now use as an opportunity to love yourself? What is it you’ve judged about yourself that you can choose to transform into an active practice and remembrance of love?

Please share with us in the comment section below.

And please know that as you share your story, you are inspiring others to do the same.

Your choice to be intentionally vulnerable is a powerful healing act, for yourself and others.

 

Thank you.

 

How to be an Empath without Suffering

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The term empath denotes an individual who is more sensitive to the energetic experience of others, whether it be people in close physical proximity, or some type of non-local interaction such as over the phone or online or simply thinking of a certain person.

In all actuality, every single individual is empathic and intuitive. We all have the ability to fine-tune our sensitivities and increase our clarity of awareness.

We all feel the energy flow of those around us to some extent, but most of this may go unnoticed. Without really understanding the details of our energetic connections, we will react to the energies and emotions of those we interact with every single day, but on a subconscious level. That is, unless we become aware of our empathically sensitive nature.

Some of us may identify with the term empath in order to justify why we feel like a victim to other people’s energies. It’s a somewhat common understanding of the empath persona to feel so deeply that we feel overwhelmed by other people’s energies quite regularly. Some may feel so overwhelmed by erratic emotions, especially when in large crowds, that we determine we just prefer the more solitary life of an introvert and decide not to go out very often. In extreme cases, we feel it’s best just to stay home, except for very specific outings we feel obligated to accomplish, such as work and grocery shopping.

 

You Can be Empathic Without Suffering

 

To become more reclusive because we are energetically sensitive is unnecessary. There is a way to be an empathically sensitive individual who can comfortably go out in large crowds, even for long periods of time. We can interact with others and not get upset by the chaotic or the seemingly ‘low’ energies that others exude. I know it’s possible, because I am also extremely sensitive and empathic myself.

Empaths are very sensitive to energies, which means being highly sensitive to emotions (energies in motion). The reason why is because empaths have naturally very wide-open heart centers.

The empath’s heart chakra is extremely strong, open and intensely tuned-in. We are sensitive to other’s emotional (energetic) states because our energy field is in tune with the flow of energy between ourselves and the individual(s) with whom we are interacting.

Our heart is our emotional facilitator: and when it’s strong and open, we are emotionally very aware.

Being so energetically tuned in is why some of us get overwhelmed in large crowds. It can feel extremely chaotic and challenging to clearly understand what we are experiencing within ourselves versus what energies we may be sensing from others.

What we call emotion is simply our personal impression of the creative life-force energy flowing as, through, and within our being. This vibrant life-force energy is always flowing as a divinely orchestrated harmonic symphony, the quality of which is impeccably perfect and isn’t logically understood by analyzing, but only experientially realized as it’s felt and known within the core of our being.

When we experience this creative life-force flow clearly, we tend to become transfixed in a state of complete reverence and awe for the utter beauty that encapsulates us. Vibrant wellness is our natural state when we allow energy to flow through us. Being in an energetic state of absolute allowance, in each moment, is experienced as total peace with What Is.

 

Allowing the Ebb and Flow of Life

 

We may perceive the life-force energy flowing within our being as potentially negative or positive. But those thoughts are just our personal judgments, based on whether we are openly embracing that moment or if we are viewing our experience through the confused lens of fear and insecurity, creating resistance to that moment as it is.

The energy of life exists as the infinite flow of creation, and is neither negative or positive… yet it does ebb and flow, expand and contract. We cannot escape this flow or the cyclical shifts within it. We can only honor the entire flow in all its glory, so that we may be at peace with What Is.

What we may consider negative—such as death and destruction—is simply the creative process of eliminating what’s no longer vibrantly useful, opening up space for more expansion, and essentially creating the new from a fresh foundation.

All is a part of nature’s creative flow.

Yin and Yang occurs in this physical life experience, no matter how much suffering, struggle, and pain we may scream out against as a plea for it to stop. All is extremely sacred and vital, no matter how we may perceive it in the moment.

When we see clearly, we experience all as the sacred flow of infinite love. Struggle and suffering occurs because of our resistance against the contractual ebb of the sacred flow, not as an actual component of the flow.

We ourselves exist as the sacred flow of life. We are all innocent expressions of this sacredness in physicality. Our feelings exist as our individual impression of this creative flow as it coincides and connects with our personal experience.

When we are in a state of full allowance, being completely open energetically and by embracing all just as it is, we feel the emotions as being extremely pleasant and positive. The energy flowing unimpeded is what causes us to feel peace, serenity, contentment, calm, inner reflection, grace, limitless expansion, creativity and reverence for all.

 

Fear is Resistance

 

When we doubt, or buy into fear, we are seeing this energy through a perception that interprets the flow of energy as harsh, upsetting, disturbing, and antagonistic. We may have thoughts that tell us there’s a potential problem, and we may get caught up in the idea that something needs to be solved, resolved, protected against, proven, defended, or justified. We may feel stressed out, sad, angry, or uneasy because we buy into beliefs that lack may be our ultimate destiny.

Fear that all may not be well distorts our perception, causing us to experience the energy flow as uncomfortable and undesirable. Many of us tense up to resist the flow of energy when we fearfully perceive it as negative, because we think we should avoid feeling it in order to protect ourselves. We may suppress feeling anything we perceive as negative because we think we must ‘be positive’ to keep ourselves in a ‘higher state of vibration’ or to effectively create the reality we desire.

Our emotional state is always our own individual interpretation of the sacred flow of life.

Allowance is our naturally harmonic state of pure being which honors everything we experience and feel. Resistance, due to inner fear and feeling unworthy, is an effort to try and restrict the flow of energy within our experience, with the intention of keeping us safe—and yet doing so keeps us struggling against what is and only offers us suffering along the way.

 

Judgement Disrupts the Flow of Life

 

When we are empathically sensitive and feel uncomfortable when interacting with an individual, we may determine the other individual’s energy as ‘low’, ‘dense’, ‘heavy’ or ‘negative’. That’s when many of us empaths may determine it’s time to leave the situation to avoid that which we don’t prefer.

If we have determined another’s energy as ‘low’ or ‘negative’, that is an indicator we hold judgments and are buying into a belief of inferior and not ‘good enough’.

We only judge that which we fear. We only judge that which we deny and that which we’ve ignored within our own selves.

We judge another’s anger when we’ve suppressed our own anger. We resent another’s flow of joy when we’ve sacrificed our own joyful flow. We may also misinterpret or take another’s ‘negative’ energy personally, because we don’t realize we have unresolved insecurities within ourselves.

Our level of comfort or discomfort is always our own perception of the energetic flow. We do not experience another’s interpretation of the flow of energy, as that is filtered through their own state of being, beliefs, and awareness.

When we allow the life-force energy within our own field to flow freely (even during the ebbs of contraction), we will not determine (judge) the flow of energy within another as negative or bad, ever, no matter how the other individual experiences their own energy. We will honor the flow of energy as we and they each choose to experience it—without our personal judgments of how open or closed, dense or light, low or high we think their flow of energy may be and without feeling the need to analyze all the potential reasons why their energy may or may not be flowing.

 

Become Empowered as an Empath

 

The best way to become empowered as an empathically sensitive individual is to strengthen and increase our conscious awareness of our own connective flow to the sacred energy of life.

If we take full responsibility for our entire experience of life, we will choose to honor our own creative flow.

We can follow our heart and our knowing, and create our own amazing experiences from the joyful passion of our innermost essence. In this way, we are not actually increasing the energy itself, but are simply becoming more consciously aware of the sacred flow of energy (life) and our individual connection to it.

 

Strengthen the Solar Plexus to Ground Emotional Experiences

 

Finally, we can become more conscious as we perceive our individual energetic flow as an aspect of our power center, our solar plexus chakra. The solar plexus is the energy center within our gut that determines our level of confidence in our physical expression. This is our power center because it’s where the flow of life-force energy is most directly felt within the physical body.

As this chakra is located directly below our heart, it’s the main energy center uniting the physical human aspect of our being with our more etheric energetic essence; it is the bridge between our more intuitive senses/aspects and the physical component of our being.

Our heart and solar plexus unify our cosmic universal energy within the active physical expression of our being in human form. Our solar plexus is the vital energy center which provides us the means to actualize our fulfillment here in the physical world.

By strengthening our solar plexus, we balance our huge heart center with the grounded, physical components of our being, uniting our sacred divinity within the physicality of our human vessel. We more readily actualize our fulfillment within the physical as we apply our inner knowing confidently, by aligning our choices in each moment with our gnosis, as we balance and strengthen our solar plexus to match our already-huge hearts.

Having a huge heart but not being able to physically express that energy will only result in feeling emotionally unstable, as a victim to our circumstances and the people that form our experience, while feeling unable to physically manifest our greatest dreams.

When we embrace that which is unconscious within, enveloping all the potential unknowns with total compassion, we will no longer judge that which is unconscious within others.

Embracing all that we avoid, reject, suppress, ignore, and deny with absolute compassion offers our wounded innocence solace.

 

Allow Life to Flow with Unconditional Compassion

 

By fully facing, acknowledging, and shining the light of awareness on that which we fear, that which may appear hideous in ourselves or others, we can then perceive the exquisite beauty of our wounded innocence. We make that which is unconscious conscious.

Everything we have determined as either good or bad in the outside world exists as a mirror, reflecting that which we honor and embrace within or those aspects which we reject, deny, and resist within ourselves.

Unconditional compassion is not threatened, bothered, or upset by anything.

When we sense another’s unresolved pain, we will feel compassion if we’ve offered our own pain compassion. We do not like that which we’ve denied within. We are bothered only by that which we do not embrace within ourselves. We judge what we deny within. We reject in others that which we reject within ourselves.

As empaths, when we use all that we experience in our world to more clearly know our divine Self, we offer ourselves the gorgeous gift of taking total accountability for and embracing all aspects of our being with unconditional compassion. We recognize our entire experience is a miracle, a divine gift of eternal sacredness—and not a burden, test or struggle we must endure.

By accepting, embracing, and honoring all aspects of our own being, we will naturally offer the same compassion to all those with whom we experience the journey of life.

 

headshot_Anna Horst

 

Anna Horst is Creator, Energetic Empress, Psycho-Spiritual Consultant, & Empowerment Adviser at ConsciousManifesting.com

Love is the New Religion

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We are born to love.

As every mother knows, cradling her newborn child, love is the reason we are here.

As any lover knows, gazing into the eyes of their beloved, love is the reason we are here.

While it is true that we may hold vastly different beliefs, that we may pursue radically different paths and passions…at core, love is what connects us. Love joins our hearts.

Those of us who prefer logic and scientific methods experience love in just the same way that mystics do. In fact, there is no dividing line between those who pride themselves on their intellect and those who pride themselves on their meditative states. Love is the common factor of us all. Love unites us.

And when we look around our world today, at all of its changes, challenges, and growing pains, we see one common theme emerge. Love.

Love is what we seek. It is the new religion of our age: the glue that binds us, the spark that motivates us, the path that propels us forward.

If we look at the etymology of the word religion, we see it comes from the Latin root ligare, meaning “to bind.” Indeed, we are on a journey of coming together. We are stepping out of our old divisions, out of our old closets of fear and prejudice. We are, as a collective species, learning to drop the harmful dogmas of the past, the old fundamentalist religions of yesterday, and stepping into the new—love.

Love bind us. In love, we see we are not separate.

We are one human family. We are one beautiful planet.

Of course, many of us have different definitions of “love.” This is good! Our varied experiences and ways of defining love is a benefit to the shifts and changes our global community is currently experiencing. Diversity is beautiful and healing. Through varied ways of understanding and conceptualizing love, we can widen our hearts, and perceive the stories of those whose daily lives and customs might differ from our own.

For example, let’s travel to India. Let’s sit down in a marketplace and speak with a stranger. As we listen, we learn that the most love this person has ever felt was on the day his wife was cremated in a public ceremony, in an Antyesti. As we listen deeply, we might learn that this man, this man who cared for his wife so deeply, felt his consciousness expand when he saw his beloved’s body burst into a million billion flames. We learn how a deep sense of awe arose in his heart as her flesh turned to smoke before his eyes. We realize that the catastrophic pain and trauma he experienced through losing his wife was actually, paradoxically, the key to his spiritual breakthrough. He realized that death was not the end of life, but merely a transition. He learned that love does not end…love continues.

Yes, if we talk to this man in India, he will no doubt define love in a different way than a man would in Australia or a woman would in Belgium. We all have different definitions of “love,” many different words to describe, based upon our unique cultures and upbringings. And that’s okay! Because, at core, love is not a word or a definition…love is, rather, an energy. A state of being. And we have all felt it. It is what we share.

About seven years ago, I began to explore both polyamory and spirituality. For many years prior, I had been very staunchly anti-religious and quite bitter about what I perceived to be the shitty conditioning implanted into me by the fundamentalist Christian church in which I was raised—a church that condemned gays to hell and pronounced sex outside of marriage a terrible sin. Once I left my parents’ house and entered college, new ways of life began to open. I began to breathe fresh air. In my studies and social life, I began to connect with different kinds of people across different backgrounds—people whose basic assumptions about life were very, very different from mine. I also began sharing my poetry at coffee shops and in magazines. Through this art form, I began to experience my own creativity and intuition in a way that I’d never been able to do before.

My husband and I began to explore polyamorous relationships around the time we both began to explore meditation. We began to realize that opening our hearts and intimately connecting with others beyond our union of two was deeply healing and profoundly joyful. And as we began exploring polyamory, we began to also explore altered states of consciousness—states where the rational brain was no longer explicitly in control. These states were achieved through various practices: breathing, yoga, Reiki, dance, tantric sex, and plant medicine ceremonies. It was around this time that I began to realize that even though I’d freed myself from the confines of conservative religion, there was still a desire within my heart to explore the parts of me that dwelt in something other than the mind, something other than logic or rational analyses.

A few years later, I began working as a healer and spiritual teacher. As I dedicated my life to this thrilling work, I sensed that what would be most beneficial for me would be to open my heart—not only by exploring the wonderful ways I might connect, learn, and share with new poly partners, but also by exploring the ways that I might connect with the spirit of each and every single person I encountered in my daily life. The woman bagging my groceries began to take on as much importance as my lover in bed. The man handing me cash at the bank began to take on a dearness that had been previously reserved for my husband. I became thrilled by the love energy that was flowing from my eyes, my heart, and my hands, positively uplifting everyone on its path.

As my journey progressed, I began to realize that, more than anything else, what humanity needs, right now, is love.

Indeed, love is not just about sex and romantic partnering. Love is much, much more. Love is compassion, acts of kindness. Love is a twinkle in the eye; love is laughter in the heart. Love is doing for others.

Most importantly, love is loving ourselves. Love is looking in the mirror each morning and saying to our own reflection, “You are beautiful! You are awesome! I love you!”

We came to this life to love.

Love dissolves the feeling of separation that seems to come between us. Love lets us feel close again.

Love lets us forget ourselves: forget our own pain, our own struggles—if only for a moment. Love heals. Love unites.

Indeed, love is the new religion of our times. I believe this is why polyamory is rapidly gaining popularity and public recognition. As relationship radicals such as poly and LGBTQ folks free themselves from the limiting cultural norms and dogmatic religious constructs of an old paradigm that is on its last legs (Trump represents the last dying gasps of an old way of viewing the world), new kinds of families and new kinds of community are being created. No longer are we isolated into our separate monogamous dyads, fearfully protecting and shielding ourselves from a scary outside world. No. There is, more and more, a brave intuition that what makes the most sense now is to come out and come together. Now is not the time for closets, retreat, and fear—no. What we need to do, right now, is to bravely come together, opening our hearts and sharing our lives and stories.

On this new path, we drop our judgements and see each person for the divine beautiful soul that they are. We see beyond the outward appearance, behind the names and roles and occupations, and see the glimmer of pure life force within. We see ourselves as brothers and sisters, in love.

As we create this new planet, we create from a space of love, putting in place new modes, new forms, new structures, new expressions of what it can mean to be a human being.

As we wake up, we create more love, from love.

We transform. Everything.

 

 

Language

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I think of our house.
The one that was ours.
Nipples, thighs,
and never a storm.

A house encircled by palm.
Flocks of orange-winged
blackbirds,
each morning,
speaking our name.

XOXO
XOXO